Have you ever had an epiphany ? That is, you can go through your whole life without thinking about something obvious, then suddenly, wham, like a smack in the forehead, a realization washes over you and changes your life forever.
That happened to me several years ago, way, way into my adulthood. I suppose I knew the concept I'm about to describe, but it was never put into words for me, and I never had the smarts to think of it myself.
One day, those several years ago, husband Jim said, apropos of I forget what, “You're an adult, you can do anything you want.”
Wow. Now, I know some of you have carried around that idea for all of your adult lives, but it never really occurred to me that I really could do anything I wanted. As long, of course, as I was also willing to pay the price. That meant, I realized, that the next time I had a minor tiff with my husband, instead of pouting for half a day, then tackling a pint of Ben and Jerry's Cherry Garcia, I could just pack up and leave. Poof. No more arguments !
Not that I'd ever zoom off into the night because of an argument with Jim, but until he voiced it for me I'd never before realized the absolute freedom that came with adulthood. I could quit my job, go to night school and pop up a couple of years later with a degree in rocket science, or pen a best-selling trashy novel, or move to the Rockies and open up a ski rental booth. Virtually everything was open to me once I digested that truism.
If I wanted to now I could sneak out of the house, (It's midnight.) trot around the corner and stick up one of the convenience stores with a gun carved out of soap. (Irish Spring or Dove?) That would, of course, land me in the local hoosegow, but maybe I could write my novel while doing time. Jim would be free to open that ski rental booth, or return to Marathon, Florida where he could go back to fishing off the Seven Mile Bridge until I was sprung.
I use that phrase whenever I want to do something that I really shouldn't be doing, like ordering a large popcorn with extra butter and salt at the movies, driving a little too fast on an empty road, staying in bed until noon reading a trashy novel, or consuming more than one Ben & Jerry's little pints of heaven a month. Twelve 2,500 calorie desserts a year shouldn't hurt me too much, should they? I'll walk an extra block.
I found another type of freedom as an adult. When I quit smoking in my 40's I found I was able to ride in a car all day, sit through a movie and walk to the corner without panting. That was one of the best things I've ever done for myself. I was so hooked on tobacco I couldn't go 30 minutes without a cigarette. Luckily, I quit before places, especially work places, went smoke-free. If I had been forced to go outside to smoke, I'd have been taking 16 long breaks a day. But even today, 17 years later, I sometimes still reach for a cigarette when the phone rings. Nothing's perfect.
Comments (0)
Greatest Cape
http://www.greatestcape.net/article.php/new_day_dawning_en